I\u2019m Not Waiting Anymore<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I don\u2019t know how to say this without sounding completely broken.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019ve been waiting on God for so long that I can\u2019t even remember when it started or why.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I can\u2019t remember what I was originally waiting for.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The prayers have blurred together. The hope has worn thin. The \u201cany day now\u201d has turned into years.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And right now\u2026 I\u2019m not waiting on nothing anymore.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019m tired.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019m broken.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019m disappointed in a way that feels too heavy to carry nicely.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Everybody loves quoting the end of Job \u2014 the double blessing, the restoration, the happy ending.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But they don\u2019t talk about the long, ugly middle where even the man who feared God starts wondering if the waiting is just another cruel joke.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I still believe God exists.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I just don\u2019t know if He\u2019s listening to me right now.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And I\u2019m too exhausted to keep pretending I\u2019m okay with the silence.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So today I\u2019m saying it out loud:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019m not waiting with excitement anymore.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019m not holding my breath for the breakthrough.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019m just here. Still breathing. Still in the pot. Still boiling.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Maybe one day something will shift.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Maybe it won\u2019t.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Either way, I\u2019m done forcing hope that feels fake.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
My name is Job.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019ve waited so long I forgot what I was waiting for.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And right now\u2026 I\u2019m just trying to survive the waiting itself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Still Building.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Even when I don\u2019t know what I\u2019m building toward anymore.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
paypal.me\/VanDerMerwe7<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I\u2019m Not Waiting Anymore I don\u2019t know how to say this without sounding completely broken. I\u2019ve been waiting on God for so long that I can\u2019t even remember when it started or why. I can\u2019t remember what I was originally waiting for. The prayers have blurred together. The hope has worn thin. The \u201cany day […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-108","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\n